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Archive for November, 2006

Child molestation gave me so many things.
Somedays I wonder why I was chosen to receive these gifts, and why I had to have them.

Usually gifts you get from someone are genuinely given out of love and concern.
Love and concern types of gifts include hugs, but not the kind that give sexual pleasure to one person.
Caring gifts include things I need, however nothing was expected back to make it even.

But the gifts I received from my abusers–people who were supposed to love me… are too personal and painful to list. It just hurts… the terrible memories to suicide attempts… and so many others suffer from getting these gifts as well every day.

Pedophiles always claim that they are innocent, while sitting all day at Boychat/girlchat/wherever with their pedophile friends lusting after children. Proud to be a pedophile –in their sexual deviance there is no morals and no definition of ‘too young’.
So many are filled with lust, they cannot do anything else.
Especially if the pedo isn’t trying to change.

When they are so proud to be a pedophile, they resist change and embrace child molestation.
Period.

*gifts in this sense mean everything rotten moldy and terrible.

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Child molestation gave me so many things.
Somedays I wonder why I was chosen to receive these gifts, and why I had to have them.

Usually gifts you get from someone are genuinely given out of love and concern.
Love and concern types of gifts include hugs, but not the kind that give sexual pleasure to one person.
Caring gifts include things I need, however nothing was expected back to make it even.

But the gifts I received from my abusers–people who were supposed to love me… are too personal and painful to list. It just hurts… the terrible memories to suicide attempts… and so many others suffer from getting these gifts as well every day.

Pedophiles always claim that they are innocent, while sitting all day at Boychat/girlchat/wherever with their pedophile friends lusting after children. Proud to be a pedophile –in their sexual deviance there is no morals and no definition of ‘too young’.
So many are filled with lust, they cannot do anything else.
Especially if the pedo isn’t trying to change.

When they are so proud to be a pedophile, they resist change and embrace child molestation.
Period.

*gifts in this sense mean everything rotten moldy and terrible.

Read Full Post »

Child molestation gave me so many things.
Somedays I wonder why I was chosen to receive these gifts, and why I had to have them.

Usually gifts you get from someone are genuinely given out of love and concern.
Love and concern types of gifts include hugs, but not the kind that give sexual pleasure to one person.
Caring gifts include things I need, however nothing was expected back to make it even.

But the gifts I received from my abusers–people who were supposed to love me… are too personal and painful to list. It just hurts… the terrible memories to suicide attempts… and so many others suffer from getting these gifts as well every day.

Pedophiles always claim that they are innocent, while sitting all day at Boychat/girlchat/wherever with their pedophile friends lusting after children. Proud to be a pedophile –in their sexual deviance there is no morals and no definition of ‘too young’.
So many are filled with lust, they cannot do anything else.
Especially if the pedo isn’t trying to change.

When they are so proud to be a pedophile, they resist change and embrace child molestation.
Period.

*gifts in this sense mean everything rotten moldy and terrible.

Read Full Post »

Survivors Unite!!

We have lived through our childhoods which were filled with turmoil. We have become stronger through our survival.

This blog post is in honor of Judy Castelli, a survivor.

http://www.multiple-personality.com/index.html
These pictures I found at:
http://www.multiple-personality.com/gallery3.html

This is stained glass art by Judy Castelli.
This one she named Chaos

This one is called “big ones upfront”

This picture feels like
Mommy please love me
please keep me safe


… survivors

brothers and sisters-

apart we hurt

together

we are made whole.

Read Full Post »

Survivors Unite!!

We have lived through our childhoods which were filled with turmoil. We have become stronger through our survival.

This blog post is in honor of Judy Castelli, a survivor.

http://www.multiple-personality.com/index.html
These pictures I found at:
http://www.multiple-personality.com/gallery3.html

This is stained glass art by Judy Castelli.
This one she named Chaos

This one is called “big ones upfront”

This picture feels like
Mommy please love me
please keep me safe


… survivors

brothers and sisters-

apart we hurt

together

we are made whole.

Read Full Post »

Survivors Unite!!

We have lived through our childhoods which were filled with turmoil. We have become stronger through our survival.

This blog post is in honor of Judy Castelli, a survivor.

http://www.multiple-personality.com/index.html
These pictures I found at:
http://www.multiple-personality.com/gallery3.html

This is stained glass art by Judy Castelli.
This one she named Chaos

This one is called “big ones upfront”

This picture feels like
Mommy please love me
please keep me safe


 

 

… survivors

 

brothers and sisters-

apart we hurt

together

we are made whole.

 

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Thats right!!

I am not going anywhere!

lol!

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Thats right!!

I am not going anywhere!

lol!

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Thats right!!

I am not going anywhere!

lol!

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Thats right!!

I am not going anywhere!

lol!

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I have the power and the goodness to overcome depression.
I have all it takes to be me and value my self.
I am valuable to myself which is all that really matters.
No one can take that away from me.

Child abuse did not steal my soul
God saved it.

They did however try to
and try to and try to and try to
All of them, who harvested the skin off my body
who stole the innocence I once was
supposed to be -as a little girl-
I was supposed to enjoy the world-and now-
my world is too young to be gray and frail and….. dying.
but it is
and
I can scream,
and
it won’t stop
I can run far away,
and
it won’t stop.

Life begins and ends.
You leave chunks behind when you die-
some bigger or smaller than others-
those chunks live on in all sorts of ways.
They can be people or a lover’s memory or newspaper clippings.
Photographs, letters, an archive, or a family reunion.

Legacies of you.
Pieces of time remain- still frozen-
a laugh
a smile
a hug
a word
that you gave someone,
remains forever.

… like a scar.

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I have the power and the goodness to overcome depression.
I have all it takes to be me and value my self.
I am valuable to myself which is all that really matters.
No one can take that away from me.

Child abuse did not steal my soul
God saved it.

They did however try to
and try to and try to and try to
All of them, who harvested the skin off my body
who stole the innocence I once was
supposed to be -as a little girl-
I was supposed to enjoy the world-and now-
my world is too young to be gray and frail and….. dying.
but it is
and
I can scream,
and
it won’t stop
I can run far away,
and
it won’t stop.

Life begins and ends.
You leave chunks behind when you die-
some bigger or smaller than others-
those chunks live on in all sorts of ways.
They can be people or a lover’s memory or newspaper clippings.
Photographs, letters, an archive, or a family reunion.

Legacies of you.
Pieces of time remain- still frozen-
a laugh
a smile
a hug
a word
that you gave someone,
remains forever.

… like a scar.

Read Full Post »

I have the power and the goodness to overcome depression.
I have all it takes to be me and value my self.
I am valuable to myself which is all that really matters.
No one can take that away from me.

Child abuse did not steal my soul
God saved it.

They did however try to
and try to and try to and try to
All of them, who harvested the skin off my body
who stole the innocence I once was
supposed to be -as a little girl-
I was supposed to enjoy the world-and now-
my world is too young to be gray and frail and….. dying.
but it is
and
I can scream,
and
it won’t stop
I can run far away,
and
it won’t stop.

Life begins and ends.
You leave chunks behind when you die-
some bigger or smaller than others-
those chunks live on in all sorts of ways.
They can be people or a lover’s memory or newspaper clippings.
Photographs, letters, an archive, or a family reunion.

Legacies of you.
Pieces of time remain- still frozen-
a laugh
a smile
a hug
a word
that you gave someone,
remains forever.

… like a scar.

Read Full Post »

Taking a break

I am taking a break for a while.

I am sure it doesn’t matter anyways.

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Enough said!

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